Should You Give the Church Your Children's Inheritance?

Now, Contending for the Faith. In this regular feature, Dave and Tom respond to questions from listeners and readers of The Berean Call. Here’s this week’s question: 

“Dear Dave and Tom: I heard Dr. James Dobson on a recent radio show tell listeners that perhaps it would be wiser to invest in his ministry than to give their children their inheritance. He said something like: ‘Studies have shown that it probably does a disservice to them by spoiling them.’ This seems to be in the spirit of Matthew:15:5But ye say, Whosoever shall say to his father or his mother, It is a gift, by whatsoever thou mightest be profited by me;
See All..., or am I being too critical here?”

Tom: Well, Dave, Matthew:15:5But ye say, Whosoever shall say to his father or his mother, It is a gift, by whatsoever thou mightest be profited by me;
See All... doesn’t exactly say that. This person who wrote says, “in the spirit of it.” I’ll just give our listeners those verses. Jesus is speaking to the scribes and Pharisees: “But he answered and said unto them, Why do you also transgress the commandment of God by your tradition? For God commanded saying, Honor thy father and mother: and, He that curseth father or mother, let him die the death. But ye say, Whosoever shall say to his father or his mother, It is a gift, by whatsoever thou mightest be profited by me; And honor not his father or his mother, he shall be free. Thus have ye made the commandment of God of none effect by your tradition.” So it’s not the same, but I can see this person…

Dave: It’s almost a reverse. The Bible very clearly says that the fathers ought to lay up for the children, not the children for the fathers. But in this case it seems to be elderly parents, and the young man who has the means and should be helping them, supporting them, he gives it to the temple or whatever and says, “Oh yeah, but it was a gift. I gave it to God.” And Jesus is saying, “Your first obligation is to your parents.” And the Scripture does say we ought to lay up for our children. 

And now for this ministry to say—well, Tom, first of all, I find it difficult to believe that James Dobson or anyone else would say that. We’re taking this person’s word for it, so we’re not jumping on James Dobson. Let’s just be hypothetical. Any ministry that would say that, that’s stooping pretty low, I would say. They must be really desperate for money, because the Bible says parents should lay up for their children, not the children for the parents, and… “Oh, it’s going to spoil them!” Not always, not in every case. It depends. The person may have very little to pass on to their children; the children may really desperately need it, who knows?

Tom: Right, or God may use them to use the funds in ways that the parents may not.

Dave: So, Tom, I’ve heard that this was said by a pastor out there with a huge church, and again, I don’t know. I don’t know who was saying it. It sounds like maybe it’s become an item that is being passed on from one ministry to another: “Well, this is the way to get some more money now.” And I understand that there are living trusts, you know, various ways that ministries…we don’t do that, by the way.

Tom: I was going to ask. Dave, what do we do along this line?

Dave: Tom, we…

Tom: We don’t even ask for money.

Dave: We don’t do anything. We have never asked for one dime for ourselves, and we don’t criticize those who do.

Tom: No, it’s just the way the Lord has directed us, and it’s through our board of directors. This is where their heart is, this is how they would like us to go about it, and again, the axiom—I think there is truth to it—where God guides He provides, and that’s what we want. We want that guidance.

Dave: And, Tom, we dare not boast in this, because we are absolutely dependent upon the Lord. I don’t know how—and I was just saying that to someone today—I don’t know how He moves people’s hearts to give to The Berean Call. It just—sometimes it staggers me.

Tom: His graciousness in that area has been wonderful.

Dave: Just in January, for example, the people that God moved their hearts to send in funds that we need. And you think, “Well, you know, December, that’s the month when you give,” because for tax reasons, you know, you get them out of the way. You surely wouldn’t be giving in January. I mean, you’ve got a whole year! Wait until December again, and then get your tax write-off, and in the meantime you can use the money for yourself. Tom, it’s just amazing! In January, God has moved peoples hearts to support this work.

Tom: And, Dave, there’s another part of that—you know, we’ve been through tough times. You know, Paul says, “I know both how to be abased and abound,” and we’ve had the abasement, okay? And now we are having the abounding. You know, from time to time we have that, and that, to me, presents a greater responsibility. Now how do we use what God has provided to His glory? It’s like you have to go to the next step in terms of leaning upon Him, looking to Him, how we can put funds in projects, and so on that will glorify God and be edifying to the body, present information, and so on. I mean, it’s not the end-all be-all of just, “Okay, now we just lay back.” It really presents a responsibility.

Dave: Well, Tom, we are dependent upon the Lord from day to day and month to month. But when He does provide, if He provides over and above what we have needed (and we don’t whether that will happen again), then we must find a way… We don’t sit on funds. “Lord, then you’ve got a project for us. What do you want us to do with this?” And of course, Tom, as you know, there are many, many things that we can do if the funds come in. We’ve got all kinds of projects and ideas. 

Anyway, getting back to this, it’s tragic, Tom, and may the Lord deliver us from ever asking for money, much less trying to persuade people: “Instead of giving it to your children, give it to us.”

Tom: Or making merchandise of those the Scripture warns in the last days is going to happen.

Dave: Yeah. So, you know, it is…I tell the Lord over and over, and I just bow before Him and say, “Lord I don’t know how You move peoples hearts to give to us, many people that I have never met. But, Lord, if You stop moving peoples hearts, You can shut us down.” The Lord can shut us down any time He wants to, so that causes us to be all the more careful. “Lord, we want to use whatever You give us. We want to use it to Your glory. We will not compromise Your Word. We want to honor You, we want to honor Your Word, and we want to do Your will. Lord, please guide us and show us, and thank you again and again for providing for us.”