Feng shui

     (AP) 3/7/2002: The citizens of Sausalito, Calif., have been debating whether to build a new police station since a 1995 flood destroyed their old headquarters. The new building’s design has opponents who have complained about its size, aesthetics and, worst of all, its lousy feng shui (the art of harmonious arrangement that pays attention to how physical surroundings affect spiritual energy, or chi).

     According to Mayor J.R. Roberts, “there are energy forces we can’t see out there.” Critics say the proposed design would block the positive flow of energy through town. Feng shui expert Nancy Bennett testified that it would “cut off the mouth of chi” and created “arrows of sha.” The cops wonder if they’ll ever get their new building. Pessimists say, “Not in this lifetime.” To which the optimists reply, “But maybe in our next one.”